Lissa's blog

A good friend wrote me an email today about a topic that is really important to me: Getting out of debt. And seeing as how there are lots and lots of people out there who could have written the exact same email (except that they don't know me, and she does!), I asked her if would be okay if I shared it on my website. Here it is:

Hey Melissa

How are you??? I am doing well. I'm actually emailing you for some financial advice. If you can't point me in the right direction, do not worry. I just thought of you when I was trying to figure some things out.

(My husband and I ) have gotten to a point in our life where we are making a substantial amount of money. HOWEVER, we have nothing to show for it minus a 401K and credit card debt. I just don't know where to begin to turn things around. I'm tired of living pay check to pay check and I know there is a better way.

Where do you suggest I start????

Woohoo! You have to understand something. Now that Jim works for Dave Ramsey in the IT department, we don't get to spend a lot of time working with people one-on-one to help them get out of debt. We rarely get to see firsthand the effects of Dave's ministry, since Jim's work is entirely behind-the-scenes. This email was a blessing to me today.

I am so, so passionate about this subject. Being debt-free has changed our lives. Actually, the process of becoming debt-free is what initially changed us. We started working together on our finances. Our marriage improved, our giving improved, our relationship with God improved, our stress levels improved...

A few years ago I heard Dave Ramsey say, "Imagine a life without any payments," and it actually depressed me. I couldn't imagine it. It seemed unattainable. No credit card debt? No car payments? No student loans? We had tens of thousands of dollars to pay off! I just didn't think we'd ever, ever get there.

But we did. We budgeted and we cut corners. We scrimped and we saved. And we did it. A life with no payments. A life that allows me to be a stay-at-home mom even after a giant move and a pay cut! A life that allows me to hug and kiss my husband when we talk about money instead of crying and storming off in frustration. A life that enables me to try my own craft business, a dream I have had for a while. A life that allows us to give cheerfully. A life that never has to worry about paying the bills.

I want so badly for other people to experience the same peace that we have. I want my friends to break the cycles of fear and fatigue, constantly working to pay for things that no longer bring them joy. I want other people's children to avoid the mistakes their parents made, so they too can have peace.

It's hard to break the cycle that our culture promotes. It's difficult to be different and do something uncomfortable. It isn't fun to make sacrifices. But very few things worth having come easily. I'm so excited to have someone I care about tell me that she is ready to be different and take the road less traveled for the sake of the reward. (And you can ask anyone who has traveled this road: The reward is indeed great.)

Do you know someone who is in the same boat as my friend: Someone who is sick of having, as Dave says, "Too much month left at the end of the money?"

Do want to know what I told my friend? Where should you start if you're sick of living paycheck to paycheck? This post is too long already. And I don't want to give out the answers without making you think first. If you want to know, you'll have to check back in the next day or two!

I have had really bad luck with the postal service lately, and I am about ready to tear my hair out. Several items I shipped on different dates to different locations this year never made it to their final destinations. And, my in-laws never got their Christmas cards. (Who knows how many other people didn't get theirs either, but I just don't talk to them every day!) One of my customers never got the Christmas presents she custom-ordered from me. The frustrating thing is that usually, for the cost and size of the items I am shipping, I really have no choice but to use US Priority mail. For a four ounce pocket-size calendar it costs $4.80 to ship the calendar in a bubble mailer with Priority Mail. To add delivery confirmation brings the cost to about $5.50 for that tiny envelope. Bear in mind, it is less than a $10 item to begin with. However, if it is lost, there is nothing I can do about it. The only way to solve this problem is to have the customer pay extra for insurance, and then, when the $8 item is lost, I can file a claim and wait to (hopefully) get repaid. Are you kidding me?

Another option is to ship with UPS. At least they will give a tracking number so an item can be located when it is lost, right? This past week I took in a $40 wreath, already packaged, and had the UPS store weigh it and tell me the cost of shipping. It cost me $9 to ship, and that came with a tracking number and up to $100 insurance (none of that is optional). After sending that item, I had the clerk weigh my tiny four-ounce envelope to tell me what that would cost to send. Are you ready? It would cost me the same $9 that it cost to send my big boxed wreath!! So, in order to make sure my item gets where it's going, I'm supposed to tell my customers that they have to pay more for shipping than the cost of the item? It's utterly ridiculous, which is why I have continued to take my chances and send Priority Mail for around $5. But it's not working! My items aren't getting where they need to go, and I have to fork over the money myself to recreate the items, reship them, or refund my customers' money. I am at the mercy of the postal system, and the job isn't getting done. I don't know what I am supposed to do! I can tell my customers that they have to pay more for shipping, but let's be honest: Would you pay $9 in shipping for an $8 item?

What do I do when I am avoiding laundry and ironing? I find stupid time wasters! I know there are plenty out there, but this one just takes a minute.

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I type pretty fast. Are you faster or slower than me?

Kristen, at aMotherSite, wrote a quick blog about a good experience she had using Sam's Club Click 'n' Pull shopping, so I decided to find out more for myself. Oh. My. Goodness! Why have I not been doing this for a long time? The concept behind Click 'n' Pull is simple. Select the items you want to purchase from your local Sam's Club, place your order by 5 pm, and the items are ready for you to pick up the next day. Why would I want to do this?

1. It saves me time

Time is of the essence for most of us, but this feature is especially helpful for me since my Sam's Club is twenty minutes away and I almost always have other errands to do in that area. Sam's is generally the last place I stop when I have errands, because freezer and perishable items cannot sit in the car all day. When I have been running around all morning and I need to get Brennan home for lunch, I can just run into Sam's, grab the cart near the door with my name on it, push it to the cashier, pay, and leave. They don't even have to scan the items in my cart! It's already done! I just hand them my membership card, they scan a code on a sheet of paper in the cart, and I hand over my money. It's that easy. And what about those freezer items? They will get them for me while I pay, or I can leave those items off my order and push the cart to pick up those one or two things myself. It still saves considerable time.

2. It saves me money

I almost always find things at Sam's Club that I want to buy that aren't on my shopping list. If I am not wandering through the store I won't be tempted to buy $20 impulse items just because they're a good deal! (Of course, I will still go look at things there, but doing it much less often should really help our pocketbook.)

3. It keeps me organized

Yesterday morning I spent over an hour adding every single item we usually buy at Sam's to my Click 'n' Pull shopping cart. After doing so I was able to transfer those items to a saved Click 'n' Pull list that I named "family." Now, every time I am ready to make a Sam's order, I can go to that list, look through each page to see what else we might need soon, and I can avoid having to make so many frequent trips. I can also go back and do this for business items that I frequently purchase there. You can have multiple lists with a variety of items. I think having that list right there with the items already selected for me is a gold mine.

4. It maintains my sanity and Brennan's waistline

Usually the only way I can survive a trip to Sam's Club with Brennan is to bribe him to stay in the cart with the offer of a free bakery cookie. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Now I won't have to feed him unnecessary sweets or chase him up and down the aisles while I gather my things. We'll run in, grab our cart, pay, and leave. Now that's a sweet deal!

Looking back, 2008 was a pretty tough year. There were many losses and adjustments for the three of us, but there were also many examples of God's love and provision in the midst of the heartache. It's those moments and gifts that stand out when I reflect on the year.

Each December 31st Jim and I each share our three favorite memories from the year. It's a good exercise in being deliberate and grateful as we look back. This year a few of my favorite memories are very specific, and each one is particularly poignant for some reason.

1. Jim's phone call to tell me we had an offer on our house in Dallas

Taking the leap to move to Nashville with our house in Dallas still on the market wasn't a financial burden because we had housing provided here, but it was a big test of faith. We poured incredible time and money into preparing and staging our house so it would sell quickly, but the market was terrible, and there were no guarantees. We were living in a small condo with only our most basic necessities, and it was a painful time, emotionally. I knew that the sooner we were in a semi-permanent dwelling with all of our stuff, the easier the transition would be. We also needed the money from the sale of our home to actually move our things. So, I specifically, fervently prayed that our house would sell to the first person who looked at it. I knew it was a bold, ridiculous prayer, but I rarely petition God for something so specific and knew that He could always say no. When Jim called me on our third day in the condo and told me that we had a great offer on the house and that it was from the first person who looked at it, I started crying. It was a powerful moment between Jim, God, and me. The Lord could have sold our house to anyone, anytime, and still achieved his goal with us. But doing it the way He did was extra graceful, and it provided confirmation that we had honored Him with our move.

2. Playing at Concord Park

Last May I was having an especially lonely, difficult day, and I called Jim at work to tell him that we would meet him at the park on his way home from work. I picked up subs and chips, packed a few balls and sweatshirts, and we headed out into a positively beautiful spring evening. As we ate and played and ran, I felt such peace. I had prayed for a beautiful, tree-filled place to raise our family, and God had provided. And, as much as I longed for friends and connections, I was struck by how lucky I was to have such a wonderful son and husband. At one point, while I was pushing Brennan on the swing, we shared hugs and kisses, and my heart was full to the brim. It was a simple, beautiful evening that I desperately needed.

3. Traveling to Jamestown this summer with Brennan

After a trip to Pennsylvania for a family reunion this summer, Brennan and I headed to Jamestown, NY for some more family time. It was one of the first times I can remember really appreciating the area where I grew up. Every day I relived part of my childhood and saw our hometown through new eyes. We went to a baseball game, ate ice cream cones from the ice cream stand where I always went as a child, visited Midway Park (a little kids' amusement park), had a picnic, and Brennan even had a golfing lesson at Chautauqua from his grandpa. Every single day was fun from dawn until dusk, and even though we were away from Jim for ten days, I didn't regret it for one instant. It was just the rejuvenation I needed halfway through our year.

There were many other special memories, but those are three that really stand out. I am so grateful that God showered mercies on our lives while stretching and growing us this year.

This year was our first Christmas alone, just the three of us. It was relaxing and a lot of fun. We spent Christmas Eve day cooking and making a birthday banner for Jesus, and on Christmas Eve itself we took Brennan in his jammies to look at Christmas lights.

When we woke up on Christmas morning our house was clean, picked up, and beautiful. By Christmas night it looked like a hurricane had hit, and, truth be told, it has only gotten moderately better in these last four days. You see, with Christmas presents came a whole new slew of cleaning and organizing issues. I couldn't just put things away because there isn't room. Unfortunately, I do not have the personality to shove everything into a cupboard and "deal with it later." I know I'll never do it; I have to deal with things right away. Of course, that means things have to stay messy longer because I start cleaning from the inside out.

One Christmas gift this year resulted in two big organizing projects. I have enjoyed learning to cook better in the last few years, and most of my birthday and Christmas gifts in the last year have had to do with cooking. For example, my family all chipped in last May and bought me two All-Clad pans that I LOVE!!

This Christmas I got a fabulous KitchenAid food processor that I've been wanting. I know that it has to stay on my counter or I won't go to the trouble of using it. However, counter space is at a premium in everyone's kitchens, right? Not a problem for me since I had been considering getting rid of my spice rack for a while. I had 16 spices in the rack with another 40 bottles in my cupboard, and many of them were duplicates. However, eliminating the spice rack made finding all of my spices in the cupboard very challenging.

Today I went to Target and got one of those tiered shelf things, and look at my spices now! (Yes, they're in alphabetical order!)

My "baking cupboard," as I like to call it (even though most of the spices are for cooking, not baking), makes me want to whip up something scrumptious!

While I was looking at organizational items at Target, I came across these awesome wire shelves that can be stacked on each other, or, in my case, hung upside down!!

I used them to transform my pantry into an efficient closet! We have a great pantry in that it's large, but the shelves can't be moved and the wire can be tricky. With a few of these handy dandy wire shelves, some plastic storage containers, and a well-placed piece of cardboard, I now know what items I actually need to buy at the store tomorrow! I went from this:

to this:

Getting these jobs done makes me want to tackle all of our other closets and cupboards, but, unfortunately, I still have hundreds of toy cars, trains, and alphabet letters underfoot, and I really should fold the baskets of laundry sitting in the middle of my floor. Perhaps I'll achieve more organizational bliss another day.

How about you? What crazy organizational things have you had to do since Christmas? Any projects you're putting off? Questions about how to organize your cupboards?

For those of you sweet friends who have complained about trying to post comments on our website and having no luck, check it out: They're working! I have gone back and seen a few comments that were left on old posts, and I'm so touched to know that people are reading and thinking about the things we have to say! If you tried in the past to post comments to no avail, don't give up on us. We love to hear from you!

This past Saturday we had our first Lampo Christmas party. (Lampo is Dave Ramsey's company, where Jim works.) We haven't ever written about Jim's job, but we should, because it is the reason we are in Nashville.

We moved here in February of this year (2008) so Jim could start working for Dave in the IT department. It was a long, hard road to get here, but we are certain that God led us. Saturday night was a great night to celebrate this. Honestly, I was astounded (yet again) by the great company that Jim works for.

More and more I know that there is no better place for my husband to work. The team members believe deeply in what they do, they love going to work, and they are, in turn, treated like gold. They are respected, appreciated, and honored, and I can't imagine that anyone at any company, anywhere, is treated better.

What a gift to see God answer our prayers for a job that would impact others for His Kingdom. We are blessed beyond measure.

I have always believed that Brennan is a perfect blend of Jim and me, and it's apparently true! I went to this website that does face recognition, and Brennan is almost a perfect mix of us. Crazy, huh?

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Family pictures - Family web site

Today is my little sister's birthday. But she's not so little anymore. In fact, the older we get, the more the age gap closes. It wasn't always that way... I used to tease and torment her when we were young, and until she was in junior high she usually did what I told her to do. (Three and a half years makes a big difference when you're five and almost nine!) Anytime I wanted something I was afraid would make my mom mad, I sent Jenny to go ask for it. She was fearless; I was not.

Jenny has always been a go-getter. She knows how to speak her mind, and she definitely has opinions. We both do, but they're often different opinions, and we usually express them differently. I've always wondered how she gets away with being so blunt, but I envy her ability to say what she's thinking. She is quick-witted, incredibly smart, and the life of the party. She's the first one I call on for fashion advice, she's the only one I wanted around when I needed help with my move from Texas to Tennessee, and she's the first one to jump on a plane to come hang out with her nephew.

There is something about a sister that cannot be destroyed by distance or marred by time. A sister knows you - knows who you were way back when, in a way that no one else does. My sister has seen tears of mine that no one else has seen. She was there when I graduated from college, got married, left my home in Dallas, and she was the first person I called when I had a miscarriage. As we get older, I look forward to seeing her with my children, and I cannot imagine anyone else being their aunt. She is a special person, and I hate that I am never there to celebrate her birthday with her in person. So, this blog post is my tribute to her on this, her special day. It used to drive her crazy that I would always be older, but who's laughing now? Happy birthday, little sister. I love you.